The Ahndjunope Man

Youngest son had a restricted frenulum as a child and so much of what he said was unintelligble and so we were always translating for him. This also meant that he came up with a number of mispronunciations for words. Hence... the Ahn-dju-nope Man. Ahndunopes are what mail comes in and is delivered by none other than the Ahndjunope man!! I'd be sitting on the throne in the bathroom, I'd hear the pitter patter of little feet and a gruffish voice would announce "Ahndjunope Man!" and an envelope would come shooting from underneath the door. It would be addressed to mom, with a fake stap drawn on one corner and a fake cancellation on top of that and inside would be a letter to me reading I (heart) U. and Signed with the youngest son's name always remembering to put 7 horizontal lines on the E in his name. (He liked the way it looked). Not bad for a 2 year old.

As for his E's. I taught him to write his name rather early. My defense is that no one told me little kids aren't able to write their names. Any hoo younger son held his pen in the oddest way guiding the pen with his ring finger instead of held between thumb and forefinger. Whenever he wrote his name there was always 7 line in his E. I didn't think anything of it until I took him to the County as step one in the process of seeing if his speech could be helped. There were 3 separate tests, a week apart and at the end there was their evaluation.

Casey had just turned 3 at the time and the evaluation went like this.
He knew all his letters other than Q and W (which we called double wary)
His gross motor skills were lacking because he couldn't HOP! (Oh the horror, a hopless son!)
His fine motor skills were lacking as well because he held his pen so oddly. I would have liked to see those women try to write that way. I asked them if they had bothered to show him the 'correct' way. No, they hadn't. I simply handed a pen to younger son, showed him how to hold it and to write his name.
That led into the 7 lines in the letter E and how that was "Wrong". Remember the son was 3. I asked themif they had asked son why he uses 7 lines and again the answer was no. I asked younger son how many lines did a real E have. He knew the answer of three and when I asked why he wrote seven, his answer was because he liked the way it looked. Made me want to reach across the table and smack the woman.

Their final analysis was that younger son had speech problems (no shit) and that he scored as high as a seven year old on all the tests and they suspected it would have been higher if age 7 was as far as the tests tested. And this was done by a three year old, ring finger pen manipulator, 7 line E writer, Ahndjunope MAN!

We did get the frenulum clipped and he went to speech in elementary school and in Kindergarten He had an 145 iQ and in the 6th grade standard tests graded him in the 99.9 percentile of all 10th graders who took the test.

HOWEVER THE KID STILL DOESN'T HOP!

Of Pharoah heads and anniversaries

The Husband and I have been married for 36 years today. We don't do anything to celebrate simply because 36 years seems like an obscene number of years for anyone to do anything, let alone live with another person without killing them, at least once.
As if it isn't obvious, the picture above is our wedding portrait. You know the big ass one that hangs in your living room. Yes, there I am, butt in the air for 36 years. Should the husband try a move like that nowadays, he would first have to rent a crane to get me into the air. So happy anniversay us and WHAT WERE WE THINKING?

On to pleasanter things. Have you seen the new Saturn commercial with the shiny faced woman who looks as if she had never eaten in her entire life. You could slice cheese with her nose and those cheekbones.... but but but... whenever I look at her, all I can think of is that she looks like the mummified head of King Tut. No fooling. King Tut! The men agree with me and not one of them thought it odd that I even KNEW what King Tut's mummified head looks like. But then when younger son would be hangin out with friends and a question would come up like is an aardvark and an anteater the same thing, they didn't even bother going to the internet, or calling the library, nope Casey would call me and I never had to look an answer up. I have no idea how all that stuff got into my head. I'm figuring that any time now, I'll be running out of room and stuff with be dribbling out of my ears. Maybe I shold invest in a pair of corks.

HUH?!

Had another of my infamous dreams last night. In this episode, I was in someone's wedding party where the bridesmaids all wore a purple dress of their choosing. The wedding was held in only what I can call a diner with booths which meant that half of the people attending looked forward and the other half to the back. I suppose the bride and groom were to be married up front by the cash register. As for me, my wedding gift to them was meant. An eye round roast to be specific, all neatly wrapped and tied up with a ribbon.

Gotta stop eating animal crackers before bed. Sheesh

NEWS!

I feel I should send out announcements because I have my first follower.
Something like....
It's a girl, Sharon Graff proudly announces the arrival of her first follower. A saucy girl with a love for dogs and a fondness for oddness.
And as a means of celebration... a journal page!

Let's see what else is new... evil voodoo witch woman called the husband today asking for money because she and her new love got evicted and are now in a motel. Now the husband has told her in no uncertain terms that he was not going to rescue her any more AND she has to stop having her mail sent to our PO Box, both od which she ignored and so he told her again today but the next time she gets in contact with him I'M STEPPING IN and by god, if anyone kills the husband it ought to be me and not the Evil Voodoo Woman. It's not her asking for money that has me irate, it's coming to the husband for him to rescue her again that has pissed me off royally. Which means that my hazel eyes are blzing green at the moment and you wouldn't like me when my eyes are green.

I'm feeling happier with myself because I am getting into this art journal thing like I never could with just collage. And yes the journal page looks like something Teesha Moore might do but remember "imitation is the Highest Form of Flattery". I am hoping to evolve enough so my stuff looks like my stuff and not someone else's. Someday perhaps.

So that's it for today. I'm going to peek at other blogs on my list so perhaps a new inspiration will hit. I only hope that if it does, it doesn't leave a mark.

Just stuff

Not much going on. Still cleaning the mess in my 'crap room' and doubt that I will ever get it done. I dragged all of my beads out into the back yard so I could sort them and only once I had them nice and neat and tucked safely away in their double decker tool box that I realised that I had a whole tray that needed to be done. Now I had been in and out of the house 111 times which is worse then it seems because every time I went IN the house the dogs went In the house and when I headed out... well you can imagine. But now most of my beads are done and i'll leave that tray for another day when I feel the need to go outside and get the stink blown off me. Later I messed around a bit with my art journals. Yes more than one. I MUST be crazy. Then I made a mistake and started looking at other blogs and I want MINE to look like them. So I guess it's time I actually learn how to work my digital camera so that the pics actually look like something I made and not blurred as if the something I made suddenly came alive and was running for its life. I mean really. How hard CAN IT BE?
As youcan tell, it was another exciting Saturday here in the land of odds. For we definitely are an odd bunch of people, and, yes, animals as well. No one I know of has dogs that can 'talk' and now one of the cats has started a language of her own. It's out littlest cat Isabella and when I am in my crap room with the door closed she will actaully go downstairs to get oldest son to come upstairs and open the door for her. With such ingenuity I've made her her own spot in the room beside my chair. HOWEVER if she starts making collages better than mine, I'll need a spot beside HER chair.

What the......

hell did I eat before bed last night that gave me the crazy dream I had? I dreamed that Orson Wells called me to ask if I had any Acey Deucy rubber stamps and when I went to his house he showed me HIS collection of rubber stamps that filled 4 pizza-ish boxes. What the hell??????? Orson Wells and rubber stamps? I've had some weird dreams in my time but this one takes the cake.I'M not even an Orson Wells fan, though I sis like him in the movie with Loretta Young and Edward G. Robinson where Wells was a Nazi that escaped Germany after the war and had this clock fixation. But rubber stamps/ Sheesh.

DING DONG THE WITCH IS ME!!

Yes boys and girls you have read that correctly. I am now a witch. Not only any witch but an evil insane witch. I saw it in someone's blog so it must be true. That is supposed to upset me but I like being a witch. Not too sure about the evil part but insane is good because then I AM NOT responsible for my actions.
If I were a true witch with all the true witchly powers oh what fun I'd have. I'd make money grow on trees. I'd fix sick children. I'd mend broken hearts. I'd make dogs smile and pigs fly. I'd release all trapped souls so they could go to heaven. I would abolish mortgages and with it foreclosures. I'd plant rosemary everywhere just because I like the smell and I'd witch the work week into two days with the weekend the remaining five. I'd love to be a witch. Thank you strange once a friend, you have made my day though I know you didn't mean to. I think that makes it better.
Oh and this strange once friend borrowed money from me and has never made a move to pay it back AND the friendship was destroyed shortly afterwards... I sense a plot.

That being said it is noon on monday and all of my office work is done. If I were a witchI'd witch all the data entry I have to do and let it enter itself. Then the letters would fold themselves tuck themselves into the envelopes.... ahhhhh heaven.
We have a client coming in so I can't really go home and then there will be lunch and I can manage to fuddle the day away, I love fuddling.

There is really not much to say today but I was in an evil witch sort of mood and wanted to crow about my evilness. Yah me! PFFFFFTTTTTTTT strange once a friend.