Hop aboard the Dizzyland Express but watch your step
I cannot actually believe that people spend good money, at an amusement park, to go on a ride that spins them around and around until they want to puke, then they stagger off the ride only to get back on line to do it again. They can just move into my head and have the same thing for free!
At least I'm up on my feet. At least my house is small enough that when I wobble down the hallway for the bathroom I can put my hand s onto the walls of the hall and keep myself from ricocheting off them.
But this is getting olf very quickly.
I had something similar once before. Not that bad but enough that I had to take it slowly. It was when the younger son was graduating high school. IN fact it was what they called awards night when all the grads and their poor captive parents had to go and sit through endless awards that seemed to be given to the same six kids over and over. I couldn't go and younger son didn't want to but it was mandatory... acording to the idiot of a principal. So I had the husband call the school and lie...ahem... explain to whomever that I needed someone home with me so I wouldn't fall over on the circuit around the house.
So the husband calls all sincere and truthful and tells whomever that he needed our son to stay home with his mother because she is suffering from vertical and will fall down if she so much as tries to make it into the bathroom on her own. This vertical is terrible stuff, he went on, she falls over and bounces into walls and the vertical makes her dizzy. He, the husband, has an appointment that evening otherwise he would be home with her so can the son skip the awards to be my minder beause the vertical is so bad. Oh but the man laid it on thick.
NOw incase you think this attack of the vertical monster has left me unable to spell or remember what I am suffering from, let me hasten to reassure you that the husband is the one who claimed I had VERTICAL!! NOt vertigo mind you but VERTICAL. I wonder what the whomever thought. Probably that this poor woman had more probelms than suffering from vertical. Though I suppose being vertical beats being horizontal.
And while we are on the high school story. The principal of their high school was so... so.... what's the word... oh yeah dumb that on the first day of school that year she reads the tradtional you are my prisioners for the next nine months and I will be making your life a misery speech that I'm sure someone typed up for her because she read... and I'm not making this up.
"Students, welcome to another school year. I am your principal insert your name here..." Honestly. I've heard this from more than one kid so I know it isn't just younger son making a joke. The sad part is that the dim bulb never realised what she said and just kept rambling on. What a waste of skin. So, of course, she is now known as Mrs Insert Your Name Here.
At least I'm up on my feet. At least my house is small enough that when I wobble down the hallway for the bathroom I can put my hand s onto the walls of the hall and keep myself from ricocheting off them.
But this is getting olf very quickly.
I had something similar once before. Not that bad but enough that I had to take it slowly. It was when the younger son was graduating high school. IN fact it was what they called awards night when all the grads and their poor captive parents had to go and sit through endless awards that seemed to be given to the same six kids over and over. I couldn't go and younger son didn't want to but it was mandatory... acording to the idiot of a principal. So I had the husband call the school and lie...ahem... explain to whomever that I needed someone home with me so I wouldn't fall over on the circuit around the house.
So the husband calls all sincere and truthful and tells whomever that he needed our son to stay home with his mother because she is suffering from vertical and will fall down if she so much as tries to make it into the bathroom on her own. This vertical is terrible stuff, he went on, she falls over and bounces into walls and the vertical makes her dizzy. He, the husband, has an appointment that evening otherwise he would be home with her so can the son skip the awards to be my minder beause the vertical is so bad. Oh but the man laid it on thick.
NOw incase you think this attack of the vertical monster has left me unable to spell or remember what I am suffering from, let me hasten to reassure you that the husband is the one who claimed I had VERTICAL!! NOt vertigo mind you but VERTICAL. I wonder what the whomever thought. Probably that this poor woman had more probelms than suffering from vertical. Though I suppose being vertical beats being horizontal.
And while we are on the high school story. The principal of their high school was so... so.... what's the word... oh yeah dumb that on the first day of school that year she reads the tradtional you are my prisioners for the next nine months and I will be making your life a misery speech that I'm sure someone typed up for her because she read... and I'm not making this up.
"Students, welcome to another school year. I am your principal insert your name here..." Honestly. I've heard this from more than one kid so I know it isn't just younger son making a joke. The sad part is that the dim bulb never realised what she said and just kept rambling on. What a waste of skin. So, of course, she is now known as Mrs Insert Your Name Here.
posted by ---me--- at Sunday, December 11, 2005
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